2003-04-16 - 8:33 p.m.

Dream State

I was just sitting here thinking how calm this week has been.  There is no real accounting for it.  Traffic has been light. Work has been light.  There has been more actual light because of Daylight Saving Time.   Things have been easier this week.

A few times during this week at work it looked like I was heading for some sort of confrontation with the bosses but it just fizzled out every time.  Could it be that they realize that a lot of the shit they care so much about is not so important?  No.  I think it is just a coincidence.  It is just a slack week.  The pressure should pick up again soon.

For the past few days I have been trying to pick a fight with Tommy.  I don't know why.  I'll just walk into his office and say, "I ought to beat your ass."  And then leave.  Or if I meet him in the hall I'll step to him to try to make him flinch.  When he makes a quick move toward me I say, "Do something."

Today when I was talking to David in his office Tommy came in and started talking right in the middle of our conversation.  This is normal for him.  He left and came back a few minutes later and stood right between us so we couldn't see each other.  He thought this was funny.

So David asked him, "How do you pronounce the capitol of Kentucky? Do you say Louie-ville or Louis-ville?"

Without missing a beat Tommy said with great pride, "Louie-ville!" And David said, "The capitol of Kentucky is pronounced 'Frankfort' dumb ass."

So I started stomping around and saying "Awww, SNAP! Oh no he di'ent!  Face, Tommy, face! You gonna take that?"

Tommy stood there with a blank look on his face.  Then he said to me, "You know, you are one of the worst people I have ever met."

And I told him, "Well, then I want to introduce you to one other person.  A man named Jesus Christ.  Then maybe you would learn to love instead of hate."

This statement's effect was twofold.  First, it one-upped Tommy.  And second, it made him feel guilty for saying something mean.  Tommy is a Catholic and, therefore, constantly feels guilty for not being a better person.  It is very interesting to watch.

Sometimes I will say things to him and see him turning them over in his mind.  He usually comes to me when he wants to talk about religion or spirituality.  He likes to dissect behavior and discuss people's motivations.  And we often talk about modern furniture and art.

I have been experiencing a lot of nostalgic memories lately.  I'm not sure why.  Perhaps it is the recent trip to visit my parents.  Today during a training session I suddenly flashed back to when I was three or four years old and we got a new dog. My brother and sister and I were out in the front yard playing with her.  She was running back and forth between us.  I jumped up on a metal lawn chair.  I can still plainly see the metal bands that made up the seat.  It was painted yellow.  The grass had just been cut.

Why would I think of that?

Is it because I am walking around in a dream state for the past few weeks?  Lack of sleep for the past few months has taken its toll, I guess.

Jimmy
 

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